woensdag 31 december 2008

Adeu.



A humble bunch of 2008 hours left for dancing. Let's dance next to the people we love!

zaterdag 27 december 2008

Deja-vu

This town is like the back yard where the dogs I've never had would hide their bones, save them for later and dig them out when the time comes. But instead of bones I dig out memories, piles of memories. Every street, every corner, every little bench pushes me into the Gallery of Deja Vu and willingly or not I repeat my visits. Someday far far away from now we were sitting in the park in a summer morning. The sun playing with our hairs, the wind hugging us. The residual feeling of that day captured by this face on the picture. I remember it was mine.

Drum-and-bass-ing



vrijdag 26 december 2008

Decemberist

I have been decembering for 27 days now. 15 days of exams, headache and insomnia dipped in coffie, wine and what-ever-makes-you-happy-s. 2 December days of saying "good bye", generous hugs and kissing eyes that will be far far away from mine. And then on the 18th I did not have the time to sleep, wake up and realize that I am back. Back home. Suddenly, I woke up in the huge lecture hall of the University of Sofia, sitting next to Yana, listening to the witty remarks of the literature professor. That same day I woke up a few more times while reading the steet signs, ordering tee, buying potatoes. A peculiar December feeling took over when I finally laid down my heavy head on a clean white pillow listening to the thousand voices of Sofia.

Now i am decembering in this small town down south. Separated from the world. Far away from my normal life, responsibilitie and preconditions. Here everything happens in this lovely, almost habitual manner, the joy that you are able to get back to these habbits. There is our meeting point at the cinema (even thought there is no cinema to be found anymore !), there is the shop where I buy big beer bottles from (unavailable in the west), there goes the daily coffie-drinking. And all those faces and sparkling eyes, the best and the oldest friends I have had. Different and still the same. We dance under D&B beats, we drink wine, beer, whiskey, we love, we smoke, we december.

This morning I danced with the weather. The sky was still dark blue but slowly inviting a few different shades. It did not matter anyways because a marching army of snowflakes was conquering everything around me. Houses, trees, cars and roads surrendered under the merciless December attack. I marched home boldly, thus being the first opponent of the snow brigade. I passed through whitened streets where noone alse had walked. It was ment to be a fight but it became a dance because I could not resist the tempting invitations. As every true, dedicated decemberist.

maandag 15 december 2008

Breda

Another beautiful season slipped away from the fingers of Breda. Now the boulevards are empty, misty and millions of pointy branches stick out in the humid air. It is humid indeed. Breda has been my home for a long time now and I, trapped in daily obstacles, routines and curiously annoying cultural clashes, happen to ignore its beauty. Breda is special. It is pretty, yes! It is boring, no doubt about it! However, it hosted me for 2-3 years and funnily I miss it every time I leave. A manifold personality: mediocrity, pure genuine “Dutchness”, hard-to-find underground, summer loveliness and the spring-time fevers. Take this colorful mixture, stir it up carefully and add a pinch of feelings -togetherness, closeness and home comfort- and this is what the city has become for me.

Breda is the best place in world if you are addicted to the unique activity “ tossing pebbles in a river” and the worst if you do not listen to mainstream music. Breda's student life is vibrant and you will never lack parties. However, a jazz/rock/indie club would never be superfluous. And still the best of it is the people. Hundreds of international students come and go every semester. Dutch students tend to be less active. Hippies smoke joints in the Wilhelmina Park under heavy dreadlocks. Emo teens dwell around with no destination. People on bikes during the day and people under the bikes at night after the 7th biertje. Many bikes, many many bikes. And many many Bier beers. And those red-cheek old ladies hastily shopping on Saturday morning- so awkwardly cute in their boots, ponchos and skinny jeans. Lovely.

So, I am leaving all this behind again. Grote Markt will be replaced by Plaza de la Cultura, my biertjes will become rum shots in the hot Pan-American evenings and new cultural shocks will be leaving me stunned and confused. (And finally there will be mountain peeks in the horizon !). Breda, I will see you again next autumn, walking along the singels (canals), staring at the colorful sneakers of the passing-by Dutch youth.. On my way to school, in the park, in the pub, at work and at the after party. Until then, enjoy all those boots, sneakers and wheels that caress your body every day!






The world kicked back





Idols. I wonder how my parents' generation felt when their idols begun to disappear. Freddie, Curt, Jimmy. They are an indispensable part of your youth, no matter who they are (poets, actors, directors, musicians)...As for music idols, sooner or later my idols will start getting old too, selling their souls to the musical corporate machine. I can picture myself sitting in a car one day waiting for the traffic lights. Radio is on, flooded with new rhythms and new hymns. And suddenly, the 2000-2010 “Oldies” program plays a track that brings me back 20-30 years ago. Squeezing the steering wheel, I would drown in memories of sticky concert halls, beers in the park, the festival rush and the friends I sang along with. And there would be that sparkle in my eye – of sadness and joy, of longing and desire to be back there. That same sparkle I see every time in my father's eye when he hears Queen, Guns & Roses, The Doors and The Beatles. He goes back where I stand now. The youth, the self-destructiveness, the careless, mocking way in which we are obedient to the rules. This young lad on the pictures is a reflection of this youth and as all those idols he follows the same pattern. He is our poet, our drug-addict, our “bad boy” whose art will be smashed by fame and music labels. Pete, hope you have enough safety pins!

"Cornered the boy, kicked out at the world
the world kicked back a lot F**king harder now"
("Can't Stand Me Now", The Libertines)

zondag 14 december 2008

Bitter-sweet




Un domingo de resaca dulce....

maandag 8 december 2008

Corporate

I have been studying recently and my private life has gone to hell, together with my "hunting" and sociability. However, I managed to find currious facts. Studying marketing brings me one step closer to my complete disfavour of Christmass, CNN and CocaCola. Well, George Orwell would probably roll over in his grave if he could read my Marketing text book. And this is something we have to know for the exams. The following citation is connected with the formulation of the corporate communication objectives.

" If the corporate image corresponds with reality, but not with the "desired reality" (by the company) then reality has to be changed and communicated afterwards"

In my face! but hey..there are 7 more chapters to go! Lets find out what else is to be learned from coporate marketing.

Source: Pelsmaker, P. de ; Geurens M. and Bergh J. van den "Integrated Marketing Communications : A European Perspective", Financial Times Press, 2007, Chapter 6, page 164

dinsdag 25 november 2008

White Winter Hymnal



Winter has come! Northern lights are flashing in the eyes. Rythm is snowing. The fleet foxes are out to hunt!

zondag 23 november 2008

Homes

It's snowing and I feel at home. A smell of tea and butter cookies. It's Dutch and its all mine. Alex and Verena are making food, music is playing and it's...home. My home. Finally, after months of feeling out of place my head found peace.In this white house with blue doors, windows and curtains. It is hard to find a point of connection when you move around all the time. Travel, suitcases, change. Change your street, your adress, you bed, your habbits. The streets of every new city will become your life and will have a completely new meaning after you crossed them thousand times.

Tzar Simeon Veliki
Aleko Konstantinov
Bulevard Bulgaria
Bratq Miladinovi
St. Janstraat
Vogelensanglaan
Haagdijk
L'Alegra de Dalt
Concell de Cent

All my streets. All my different beds and sheets. And where was, is and will be home among them? Could your hearth be everywhere? It is present, alive and throbbing right here. Sipping Morrocan tea, listening to deep house in the early Sunday afternoon. And this first really winter day reminds me of how much I will be missing this home. Soon there will be a new 10th street on my list. And new roommates. And new trees on my street.
Somewhere far far west.
I will be missing them too.

zaterdag 22 november 2008

HE:

He stepped out of the train and looked at the time : half elf p.m.. People were buzzing around like bees- everyone trapped in their own mind but following a similar pattern. The train station was filled up with smell, tired eyes and the unsynchronized rhythm of high heels. This was not his train station and this was not his crowd. He followed the corridor to the exit and came outside. No destination, only ideas of how to spend the rest of the night. Opposite the shop, where he bought a pack of cigarettes, a huge flashy sign caught his attention, inviting him into the debts of promiscuity: “Hot Lips Sex Shop”.

maandag 17 november 2008

Not so blue



The perfect beat for Monday project meetings at school!!!

zaterdag 15 november 2008

Parra






The Dutch artist Piet Parra caught my attention may be a year ago. His chicken-style-high-heel females were staring at me from a friend's T-shirt. Consequently, they kept on finding me through blogs, posters, magazines and Le Le's Breakfast song (I upload the video some time ago). Simplicity, design, humor and originality. From the streets of Amsterdam.

vrijdag 14 november 2008

Sil



Elfs in the city.

donderdag 13 november 2008

Amsterdam





Amsterdam

This is one of those places where the main attractions simply distract attention from the real beauty of the city. Whether you sit on a bench next to the canal and drink wine from a carton AH cup ( AH is an abbreviation from the Dutch Albert Hein supermarket chain store) or you ride your bike over the enchanting little bridges and tunnels decorated with flowers you can not help but quickly become captivated by the charm of Amsterdam. Charm. A small particle of the manifold fascination of this city soaked into the Amstel river. Lush. Where greenness meets street art and modernity finds expression in a motley traditional style. The churches, the squares, the canals and the bikes. And this blue house over there that is leaning forward as if it is greeting the sparkling autumn river.

There is something idiotic and absurd about Amsterdam. Its hastiness and multicultural crowds, the orange bikes that attack you from all sides when you cross the streets. And suddenly the tram stops in the middle of the boulevard leaving you breathless and questioning your street sings knowledge. A tall blond guy runs in circles around the Dam Square with an open lap top and Moby's Go on maximum volume. Funny signs follow you everywhere you go. Its smells like everything on earth dipped in water and weed. The shops and museums are abundant but what makes them special is this particular Amsterdam-style absurdity. Visit the Bag's Museum or hey..what about that Torture Museum. Just have a look at the hundreds of sex stores and the multi-pleasure installations that they offer or the condom shops and you'll know what I am talking about. Fortunately, you can find shelter from the storm of noise, people and cars in the Vondelpark, open a biertje and..guess what? - roll one of those making-you-lought-and-stare-at-the-birds type of cigarettes. At least here its not the latest hip among the youngsters.


A night in Amsterdam. Flesh and promiscuity creep from every angle. Drug dealers try to catch your attention in 5-6 languages. You wander around canals and boats, bridge after bridge reveals the numerous new faces of the city. I love Amsterdam at night. I am immersed in its delightful variety of sins and my resistance is not always that solid :). I love Amsterdam in the Autumn because there is nothing more pleasurable than spending the afternoon in tossing pebbles in the multicolored river. You don't believe me? Come try it yourself.



This is a lovely gay bar with a lovely name!

dinsdag 11 november 2008

Just say may be......



Is this my next home? ......
I am waiting and waiting unpatiently for a result. Todavia nada!!!!! No puedo esperar mas!!! My official internship is comming soon and in my head are buzzing all these images, sounds, smells and faces of people as ancient as the Mother Earth. In reality, Costa Rica cannot be proud of any indigenous peoples but it will deffinately lure me with its beaches and jungles. In the hearth of Central America, the most developed country in the region, hot - spot Numero 1 and meet the Rainforest Alliance - my (hopefully) future employer. Sounds scary! Environmental Impact Assesment, Local Involvement and Competition, Development and Research. I hope I will focus my efforts in these fields next year...thumbs up!!

Zenzile

She preached Dignity, Identity, Liberty and Love
She symbolized Strenght and Courage
She sent her message throught the Power of Music
She was the True African Woman
Her silence will be Loud
She was Mama Africa




Rest In Peace

woensdag 5 november 2008

Yes, we can!!!

dinsdag 4 november 2008

Beirut again



I can't get enought of these guys!!! I dont ever want to!!! They comfort me so well in the cold rainy authumn days. I am kicking the wet leaves, Zachary is gently caressing my years and so we are floating together in a sea of weather.

Power Tuesday

The "Power Tuesday" the so called "Turning point in History" of today 4th November 2008 is being spent in front of the TV set. CNN, BBC 1 and 2, every Dutch, German, Spanish, Belgian and French channel available is broadcasting the ongoing contest between the "Great White Hope" and " The Dark Knight" (let your creativity and personal convictions decide who is who :))). The world is changing and I realized it last night when five young intelligent people from accordingly Brazil, Suriname, Spain, Somalia and Bulgaria were discussing religion, spirituality, politics, consciousness,sexuality and death. In the Netherlands, in my living room, over a few glasses of red wine. No tabus, no restrictions.

Greet you day of tomorrow!!!

zondag 2 november 2008

dinsdag 28 oktober 2008

Old Toshiba lap tops must be exterminated

There is nothing more disappointing than writing two pages soaked with the deepest emotions and brave ideas that your tired lonesome head could create.

There is nothing more disappointing than giving a voice to your new inspiration and redefinition of of time -both situationally doomed.

There is nothing more disappointing than an old Toshiba lap top unexpectedly shutting down itself in the middle of your sentence, violating your tought, raping your hand while typing the words.

There is nothing more disappointing than the cynical fact that the same old Toshiba lap top does not even slightly bother to save your writings.

zondag 26 oktober 2008

Fightclubbing

"This is your life
Doesn't get any better than this
This is your life
And it and it's ending one-minute at a time

You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake
You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else
We are all part of the same compost heap
We are the all singing, all dancing, crap of the world

You are not your bank account
You are not the clothes you wear
You are not the contents of your wallet
You are not your bowel cancer
You are not your grande latte
You are not the car you drive
You are not your fucking khaki's

You have to give up
You have to realize that someday you will die
Until you know that, you are useless

I say let me never be complete
I say may I never be content
I say deliver me from Swedish furniture
I say deliver me from clever arts
I say deliver me from clear skin and perfect teeth
I say you have to give up
I say evolve, and let the chips fall where they may"

"This is your life" by the Dust Brothers or Tyler Durden or "Fight club" by the uncomparable Chuck Palahnuik

Black cherry & Nutmeg

Incredible- how strong are the memories evoked by a smell. I have just found my old body yogurt . The residual aroma essence of black cherry and nutmeg was a present from my grandma this February…and just by opening it…I started a journey. A different, unplanned puzzle of events and faces. Just after opening the jar…my nostrils felt a sudden comfort; a well-known “melody” of the air….and the smell led me back there. These black cherry & nutmeg used to accompany me in the warm March days of Barcelona, under the palm trees. It was carring me throught the afternoon hours washed away with numerous claras and tapas. It was part of me at night on the beach and on the little squares. This smell would mingle with the passengers sweat and chase away the sour odors of the metro Girona to Jaume I. Fading away in the early morning it would be leaving me in laughter and joy on the dirty little streets downtown. One thing is certain: these times are gone as well as my body yogurt. But I won’t throw away this humble left-over at the bottom until it gets rotten, stinky and unbearable- it is my aroma ticket back to the idle days of my youth.

vrijdag 24 oktober 2008

More ...


This sticker I found last week, it was carelessly covering my friend's lap top surface...evoking smiles, hopes, random (un)conditioned sadness, few light remarks and empathy of a queer sort. we are not doomed.
:)

vrijdag 17 oktober 2008

woensdag 15 oktober 2008

Album covers...or there is just something about that music store....

Everytime I start my jouney to work I pass by the music store. Not that I am going to buy something but weird enought, everytime I enter the music shop on my steet the shopkeeper unintetionally ( or who knows!?!) greets me with a track I adore thus forcing me to stay at least 3-4 minutes until the song is finished. Today's vibe was "Magic" by the adorable Ladyhawke and I couldn't help but stay and enjoy it till the end.




Still wondering why this track has no proper video. Anywho, following it around the shop, checking out some new albums (while the shopkeeper was giving the eye, oh yes he did) I suddenly came accross three amazing album covers. The mysteries of the music shop reveal new secrets!!! Fond of music, fond of album covers!!! Especially when it comes to Menomena, Radical Face and Amiina.



A boy who needs a friend finds a world that needs a foe.




How could I miss them yeasterday?!!! How could people not buy them as they stay untouched on the shelf? Well I did not buy them either. The "Magic" ended and the spell of the shop gave way to some unbearable new rythms that swiftly "kicked me out" of the whole building. I found myself on the street surrounded by rain as usual and continued to way to work thinkig about my next "music store adventure".

zaterdag 11 oktober 2008

Uncensored






Last night's beat!!! Not to be viewed by audience under 18!!!

donderdag 9 oktober 2008

Mind-set

"Gold teeth and a curse for this town were all in my mouth.
Only, i don't know how they got out, dear.
Turn me back into the pet that i was when we met.
I was happier then with no mind-set."
The Shins


Sustainability
the compassion fatigue
the amusements parks
the new world order
I was thinking about the limitations
the borders
physical and mental
the pressure
the peers
th European union
and all this unification
that’s suppose to liberate us from our chains and shackles
the global warming
that I totally don’t believe in
(thanks to all the convenient lies)
the drugs
that don’t work
and the ones that still do
all the macaroni
the fruit
the rotten bread
the leftovers from last night’s dinner
the ice cream I could not finish
and I threw away
I threw away in the trash can!!!
I did it
and U2

the famine
and the money I spent on concerts
tourism
and selling culture
tourism
and the voluntary constitutional enslavement of nations
the young and deities
Ishtar and El
and all what’s left behind
and all that’s bound to follow
all the wars that we had to live through
and all the wars are still to come
whether we like it not…
all the dark knights and the evil jokers
and we…the young
that don’t feel any shame
and wont apologize

and forgive my sentimental mood tonight
I’ve been just thinking…..

Imitosis





song of the day!!! Because we are all basicaly alone

zondag 5 oktober 2008

She lost control again

My body is broken. My head too! After another party night in Breda I am waking up in the shades of my room- thirsty, hungry and with a bagful of questionable memories. The Winamp is still paying the same album of Beirut and oh my Lord!!! Not again… another Sunday Parade!!!! Breda seems to be obsessed with parades, carnivals and marathons. I can imagine them: armies of orange hats, brass instruments and drums are crossing de Grote Markt (the city’s main square) and all the central streets. As I happen to live in the centre I cant escape from it and nobody could. The marching crew starts early in the morning and toils around until late in the afternoon every given Sunday (for those who don’t know what I am talking about: type Dutch carnival music in you tube).
What could be done- volume up!!! The Cure: as a tribute to last night’s incredible New Wave/80’s Party (thank you guys for that one). As far as I remember I danced like a maniac, talked to everyone and may be that’s why there are million little bees buzzing in my head, singing “She lost control again” . Sipping my coffee in bed, reviewing my Perdo Almodovar movie collection- this is all I want on a Sunday like this. However, I will have to immerse myself in the monotone succession of actions called "work" and daydream until I drop.

woensdag 1 oktober 2008

Seabears In the Rain



After one of the rainiest days in my life I feel clean and sober. Wondering why people complain excessively about the bad weather in this country with no hills on the horizon I look outside – rain- pure and simple. It washes away our dusty thoughts and sings with millions of tiny little bells. “Ding-dong-ding-dong”: says the rain commenting on the stupid joke of the church bell. Rain doesn’t care. No matter how happy you are, no matter how miserable you woke up this morning- rain will caress you with its soggy fingers, will kiss you with dismembered humidity and will leave you right there. Yes right there in the middle of the sea waiting for the traffic lights. But I am armed with my favorite rainy soundtrack. Of course ..the little Seabears from Iceland!!!

My favourite rainy sounds....

myspace.com/seabear
nl.youtube.com/watch?v=6pWTVwoecog

maandag 29 september 2008

Surrounded by weather


is the last album by Jens-Uwe Bayer aka Popnoname. 28 years old , from Cologne and... ... just listen to his pure and gentle simplicity. Streaming from here:

3voor12.vpro.nl/speler/luisterpaal/40068670

donderdag 25 september 2008




Precious...

In bed..

On a night like this when dreams just refuse to take you on their mystical subconscious journey, my mind floats among images and faces, remembers places and comments, words that have no meaning now, but meant the world for me long time ago. This mixture and me – we are like the heroes of James Joyce’s imagination- we crash and separate and meet again. And these sleepless nights obediently follow the paths of my right brain: “where is he going to take us tonight?" May be back home at my father’s house where I would sit on the terrace on a hot summer day and wait for the heat to melt down the afternoon hours. May be back to the forest of my hometown where we would spend long nights in laughter and desire making first brave steps into puberty. Or I would just be sipping whiskey in a pub, talking to my lovers, tossing pebbles in the lake. Those sleepless nights and their stream of consciousness! They come so fast and embrace my peace with hours-long wandering. Their trail seems to be lost in seconds and never to be found again.

dinsdag 23 september 2008

Untold stories (holandizing)

Morning chaos

In de buurt...

Postcards


Where to begin? I woke up this morning with the strange feeling that I have to finnally create a blog! My blog- my personal journal, my thoughts and impressions written down, systematized and chronologically following my travels. And there are a lot of travels !!! But most of all this blog will be a connection to all these people that I miss so much and cant afford seeing more than once a year. As we cannot enjoy the comfort of our favourite little cafes as often as we used to we'll enjoy the vast possibilities of the cyber-space. :)))
There are just too many things I need to share with you... the new books I have read, the new music I have found, the people I have met, the little crazy and rediculous events in my life, the placed I have been to and the ones that I am going to very soon!

In a way the following posts will be the postcards I never sent you!!! Please , let me give you access to these tiny fragments of my life...